Saturday, May 1, 2010

To be honest...

It's almost midnight.  I have been sitting at this computer for almost 3 hours, trying desperately to write a post about vaccines.  I have struggled with it since my last post.  

One week ago, I took my oldest in for a well-check.  After promising her all day that she had no reason to fear the needle because she was done with her shots, we were informed that she needed the Hepatitis A booster.  I gave the okay and bought her McDonald's after so she wouldn't hate me.

I also discussed with the pediatrician my fears about vaccines and my struggle with the decision to vaccinate Lexi.  Although she was incredibly patient, she was very much for vaccinations and clearly frustrated with parents who are uneducated but opinionated.  I was not opinionated.  Nor uneducated.  But there seem to be many parents who are jumping on the "anti-vaccine" bandwagon without really knowing why, and they are giving us genuinely concerned parents a bad name.

In the end, Lexi recieved 3 shots.  MMR, and two that I cannot remember because it is midnight and my brain is exhausted.  The pediatrician suggested 6 different vaccines she was due for, but I was struggling with the 3 (at one time) and put my foot down.

I do not know what the best answer is.  If Lex was my first child, I probably would not vaccinate her or any subsequent children.  I am uncomfortable with what I am finding.  But I also struggle with putting her at risk for now-preventable diseases that her siblings are vaccinated against. 

As for the rumors, they seem to hold some weight.  There are cells from aborted children used in manufacturing several of the vaccines, MMR being the worst offender (I did not realize this last Friday).  The abortions were done in the 60's and as far as I have discovered, they are still using cells from the same babies.  Although the cells are not in the actual vaccine, they do require the fetal tissue to grow the viruses.  Please forgive me, but I do not know where I stand on this.  If aborted fetal tissue were continually needed for vaccines (therefor continually funding the abortion industry) I can tell you that I would be 100% against it.  But 40+ years ago?  Which now protects millions of children from vaccine-preventable diseases?  I do not know if I find it morally wrong.  I just don't know.

As for the "autism/ADHD" scare, looking back I think I let the pediatrician change my mind and I really regret that now.  MMR is a scary vaccine.  I wish I had said no.  

I cannot give you my opinion right now.  There's too much out there.  When I started this post tonight, I was for them, with caution.  But as I looked back over my research, I remembered my reservations.  To read about the aborted fetal tissue, you can simply Google "fetal tissue vaccines."  

I do not believe the truth can honestly be sought.  The drug companies have mucho $$ and they make lots of it off of vaccines.  I am not against our goverment, but I do not believe that decisions are made with our best interest in mind.  I believe mistakes are covered up, especially when money (and lots of it) comes into play.  Even if vaccines DO cause autism, I do not believe that a simple stay-at-home mom could prove it.  Especially off the internet.  :-/

So I close with not cast me off.  There is much truth, and I seek to find it.  But I started with the wrong topic.  :-(  I do not know where I stand on this issue, and may not for a while.  But food?  Aluminum? Diabetes and heart disease?  These are topics with which I have much to say.  :)  Also, I cannot simply limit my blog to my "research papers." I'm really not that opinionated of a girl.  I'm more along the lines of "curious" and "cautious."  And I have a growing fascination with finding out who I am and where I stand.  I was once a simple wife and mother, without her own mind.  Now I am a soon-to-be divorced mother of four, just trying to find her place in this world.  Come with me if you want.  :)


  1. I totally understand! I can feel "okay" with some shots and then I do some research and I freak myself out. I also understand the frustration with the drug companies. When you go to the dr. they want to give you pamphlets telling you the shots are safe, but if you look at the back of the pamphlets, they are all produced by the same companies that produce and sell the vaccines. I mean of course they aren't going to say this shot is bad, or this one can cause mental disabilities, or this one might kill your child. It's frustrating, and as much as the doctors think we are uneducated on the topic, I think they are the uneducated ones. They buy everything the drug companies sell, hook, line, and sinker. Just know you aren't alone.

  2. The fact that you are looking into it to try to make yourself more educated makes you a smarter parent than most. Regardless of what your decision is, no decision should be made based on the information handed to us by one person (our ped) who is pro-vaccinations.

    Our boys are on delayed and selective schedules. Eventually they'll end up with all the important things in my time. I just don't see a need to pump them full of things quickly or unnecessarily.

    Keep up the research, Momma. It doesn't matter your opinion, just that you are looking out for the best interest of your kids.